My boy, Tom

One of the more complex dynamics we deal with in our house is some gender confusion. M wants to be a boy. She wants to dress like a boy, play boy stuff, act like a boy, and pretend she is a boy. On the surface, I'm okay with this. I don't care how she dresses, I don't care that she plays with boy stuff (having two older brothers, I did my share of this growing up), I really wouldn't even care if she decided to be a boy when she grows up. (I'll admit, I'm a little weirded out by the thought but it's not my decision.) One problem we have is that she is not always very gracious when people view her as a girl....she's been given girl toys or girl clothes or asked about something girlie (like dolls) and she's been known to be quite rude about it. And this momma ain't putting up with that. We've had some serious discussions about accepting who we are, embracing what we enjoy, but also being gracious and understanding of common forced gender roles. We've compromised and come up with the solution that M is a tomboy. Only, the way she views it is with a capital T. She is a Tomboy, a member of an elite squad of girls that love all things boys. The good news....her best friend is also a member of this elite squad. So play dates are filled with basketball, sword fights, Beyblades, and the like.

 

I've never been a real girly girl myself but there are things I never imagined I'd be doing as the mother of only a daughter. Like buying mustaches in bulk for a birthday party. Or shopping in the boys section. Online shopping for nongirly skateboards. If you glanced in my shopping cart around Christmas time, you'd swear I had a son....basketball jerseys and nerf hoops, Captain America costumes, giant bop 'em gloves, and boy t-shirts. For her birthday, we had a Mario party and she received things like Batman Legos, stuffed Spider-Man, Batman pjs, Mario cars and games, Luigi costume (did I mention she was Mario for Halloween?), Beyblades, football, skateboard, etc etc etc. She told me her birthday was awesome because everyone knew her so well and only gave her boy stuff. Oh my little tomboy!